We often seek solace in others, hoping they’ll fill the gaps within us. Yet, in this yearning, we inadvertently surrender our agency—the very power to shape our lives. We yearn for completion from others, but at what cost?
Responsibility awaits us. It behooves us to reckon with our inner landscape—to confront inadequacies, fears, and the echoes of past hurts. But it’s easier to point fingers, to cast blame upon others for our failures. We pass the baton of growth to others, expecting them to run the race on our behalf. How shortsighted, how disempowering!
Consider the phrases we’ve heard: “My better half,” “S/he completes me.” Yet, dear friend, we ought to bring ourselves as whole beings to life’s table.
Iyanla Vanzant’s wisdom echoes: “You can never give from a half-full cup.”
Instead, pour always from an overflowing cup – the excess, the abundance. When we offer from near-dry cups, we unwittingly make the recipient a thief of our essence. We burden them with guilt upon the realization of their role in our depletion, and resentment simmers within us. And chaos brews in our relational experience.
But perhaps, just perhaps, we can learn to sip from our own cup, replenishing it with self-love and healing.
And in this fullness, we’ll find grace – the kind that doesn’t demand completion from another, but rather celebrates the beauty of our shared existence.